Baseball Ceiling

what type of funeral do you wanna have?
my funeral will be a huge party. there'll be a free burrito stand and bar and my body ain't gonna be in no damn coffin either. my dead body will be hanging from the ceiling with an uber shinny suit on, spinning and preforming as the disco ball. as things start to wind down my eulogy will be preformed, but no, not some p*ssie *ss eulogy, multiple eulogies from people that will say how they really felt about me and not about all the good things i've done. people i owe money, screwed over, or that are just *ssholes. this will get all the people in attendance riled up and just in time for when my body is lowered to head level and a baseball bat and blind fold fall from the ceiling. the people will slowly realize that i want to be a pinata and will choose the most deserving person to go first. when he makes first contact my entire body will explode sending not only pieces of my rotting flesh, but all of my favorite wordly possesions that they could fit into my carcass in every direction
Nice one! Personally I want a monster truck instead of a hearse and a Viking long boat and all my posessions burnt at sea as a choir of bare breasted maidens lament my passing on the sandy shore. Hopefully the UK will have a day of mourning and the PM will attend.
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Playing baseball in the house
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